Unit13 text2 a grateful wife has second thoughts(1)

A grateful wife has second thoughts

1I know a woman who is a grateful wife . she has been one for years . In fact ,her gratitude has been as deep and constant as her affection . And together they have traveled a long . complicated road.

2In the beginning .this young wife was grateful to find herself married to a man who let her work . That was in 1964 , when even her college professor said without a hint of irony that the young wife was “lucky to be married to a man who let her work .” people talked like that then .

3Later ,the wife looked around her at the men her classmates and friends had married and was grateful that her husband wasn?t threatened ,hurt ,neglected ,insulted –the multiple choice of the mid -60s-by her job .

4He was proud , and her cup overran with gratitude .T hat was the way it was .

5In the late?60s when other younger women were having consciousness-raising groups , she was having babies and more gratitude .

6You see , she discovered that she had a helpful; husband .nothing in her experience had led her to expect this .Her mother was not married to one ; her sister was not married to one ;her brother was not one .

7But at 4 o?clock in the morning ,when the baby cried and she was exhausted ,sometimes she would nudge her husband awake (wondering only vaguely how how he could sleep) and ask him to feed the boy . He would say sure . And she would say thank you .

8The Grateful Wife and the Helpful Husband danced this same pas de deux for a decade .When the children were small and she was sick , he would take charge .when it was their turn to car-pool and she had to be at work early ,he would drive . if she was coming home late ,he would make dinner .

9All you have to do is ask , he would say with a smile .

10 And so she asked . the woman who had minded her P?s and Q?s as a child minded her pleases and thank-yous as a wife . would you please put the baby on the potty ? would you stop at the store tonight for milk ? would you please pick up joel at soccer practice? Thank you .Thank you .Thank you.

11 It is hard to know when gratitude first began to grate one on my friend . Or when she began saying please and thank you dutifully rather than genuinely .

12But it probably began when she was tired one day or night . In any case ,during the cartime between one job and job and other ,when she would run lists through her head ,she began feeling less thankful for her moonlighting job as household manger . 13She began to realize that all the items of their shared life were stored in her exclusive computer .she began to realize that her queue was so full of minutia that she had room for anything else .

14The grateful wife began to wonder why she should say thank you when a father took a care of his children and why she should say please when a husband tool care of his house .

15She began to realize that being grateful meat being responsible . being grateful meant assuming that you were in charge of children and laundry and running out of toilet paper . being grateful meant having to ask . And ask . And ask.

16 Her husband was not an oppressive or even thoughts man . He helpful . but helpful doesn?t have to remember vacuum-cleaner bags . and helpful doesn?t keep track of early dismissal days .

17Helpful doesn?t keep a Christmas-present list in his mind .Helpful doesn?t have to know who wears what size and colors . helpful is reminded ;helpful is asked . anything you ask . please and thank you

18 The wife feels , she says , vaguely frightened to find herself angry at saying please and thank you . she wonders if she is , indeed , an ingrate , but her wondering doesn?t change how she feels or what she wants .

19 The wife would like to take just half the details that clog her mind like grit in a pore and hand them over to another manager . the wife would like someone who would be grateful when she volunteered to take his turn at the market , or his week at the laundry .

20The truth is that after all those years when she dance her part perfectly , she wants something else . she doesn?t want a helpful husband . she wants one who will share . for that , she would be truly grateful .

744 words

Rotes

1.About the author Born in Newton Massachusetts in 1941 , Ellen Goodman graduated summa cum laude form Radcliffe College . she was a reporter for Newsweek ,a feature writer for the Detroit free press and a columnist for the Boston Globe before becoming a syndicated columnist for the Washington past in 1976 . she has received a Nieman Fellowship and several awards for her newspaper columns , appears occasionally on the CBS radio program Spectrum , and the NBC today show and is the author of close to home and turning points .

2. And together they have traveled a long ,complicated road . ( paragraph 1)Both her gratitude and affection have undergone a significant change in terms of what they mean to her .

3.The multiple choice of the mid-…s60s ( paragraph3 )women?s movements first developed during the 1800?s in the United States and Europe and then spread to other parts of the world . A second wave of women?s movements emerged during the

1960?s , another period of a great political and social change in many areas of the world . These contemporary women?s movements have sought greater equality for women in the family , in the workplace , and in political life .

4.And her cup overran with gratitude ( paragraph 4 ) She was more than grateful .

5.consiciousness-raising (paragraph 5 )the process of making people understand and care more about a moral , social , or political with a view to encouraging them to take action .

6.danced this same pas de deux for a decade(paragraph8)they had this same marriage pattern for a decade .In ballet , a pas de deux is a dance sequence for two dancers .

7.car-pool ( paragraph 8) driving or being driven regularly from one place to another as a small group , with each member sharing driving responsibilities.

8.P?s and Q?s (paragraph 10) the polite manners and behavior that somebody adopts , for example , when eager to make a good impression .

9. moonlighting job ( paragraph 12 ) an extra job in addition to a main job , especially without the knowledge of the government tax department . Here , it refers to homemaking .

10.The wife would like to take just half the details that clog her mind like grit in a pore( paragraph 19) the wife would like to sort out just half of the things that weigh down her thoughts .

Questions for discussion

1.What problem does the woman face ?

2.What is her concept of a relationship between husband and wife ?

3.What changes have taken place in the woman ?

4.From the passage , what can lean about the marriage pattern in western societies

before the 1960?s?

5.In the paragraph , what dose “truth “ refer to and what is the effect of the idea thus

expressed?

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