08年深圳中考英语作文范文

Case 7 2008深圳中考

如你是Carl，是第一中学初三(3)班的学生，即将结束初中阶段的学习生活。请你用英文给你的老师写一封信，表示感谢和祝福。要求：

(1)可以列举事例：(2)条理清楚，意思连贯，语句通顺，标点正确；(3)信中不得

出现真实的校名和姓名：(4)60-80个字，信的开头和结尾己给出，不计入总词数。

范文：

Dear Mr Liu,

How is everything going with you? I’m writing this letter to thank you for your help with my study.

You are a very responsible English teacher. When I began learning English, my pronuciation is very poor. You noticed that I worried about my pronunciation. Then, you not only offer me many suggestions to improve it, but also often corrected pronunciation mistakes for me. At last, my pronunciation has greatly been improved with your help.

I’d like to thank all the help that you’ve given me, Mr Liu. Wish you a healthy and happy life.

Yours sincerely,

Carl

授课思路：

先设计这篇作文，列个提纲，可以分三段来写：

1）寒暄语2）通过详细的事例讲述老师曾经对我的帮助，从而体现老师的优秀品质

3）表达对老师的感谢和祝福

展开讲述怎样写这篇作文，重点在第二部分，可以先分析下第二部分怎么写，怎么描述一个故事。英语中我们经常总分或者总分总的结构。所以可以先写一个总起的句子概括老师的品质，再通过事例来阐述。描写一个老师优秀品质的形容词有哪些呢？patient，warm-hearted, outgoing, responsible, hard-working …挑一个你觉得最重要的一个品质来具体写，比如说：responsible.然后可以写Mr Liu 帮我纠正英语发音的故事，有这些信息点：

刚开始学英语，发音很差，您注意到，我担心自己的发音，给我提了很多建议，还帮我纠音，在您的帮助下，我的发音得到很大改善。

加连词

我们不能一个信息点写一句话。这样将是简单句。一篇好的中考作文是有复合句和简单句共同组成的。那么，怎么来写复合句呢？那个就要找各个信息点，各个句子间的关系，用一些连词把他们连起来。

刚开始学英语，发音很差—当我刚开始学英语的时候，我的发音很差。（用when连接，写一个时间状语从句）

您注意到，我担心自己的发音—sb. + 动词+ 动词对应的内容，这样的句子结构时，可以用that引导的宾语从句，用这个句型：sb + V + that + 内容

给我提了很多建议，还帮我纠音—不但给了我很多建议，而且还帮我纠音（用表并且关系的连词not only … but also连接）

在您的帮助下，我的发音得到了很大改善—(使用with 介词短语结构)

这些信息点之间的关系找到了，那么各个句子之间呢？是否还有什么关系呢？通读一下整个故事，发现可以在句子：你不但给了我很多建议，而且还帮我纠音，之前加然后，用then 表示。最后一个句子前加at last.

写句子

先强调下书信的格式，再来逐段分析

第一段：寒暄语怎么来写呢？可以套用这些句子结构：How are you？/ How have you been?/ How is everything going with you？I’m writing this letter to ….

范文：How is everything going with you? I’m writing this letter to thank you for your help with my study.

第二段：书写时强调一下，最后一句用被动更好。汉语多主动，英语多被动。

范文：

You are a very responsible English teacher. When I began learning English, my pronuciation is very poor. You noticed that I worried about my pronunciation. Then, you not only offer me many suggestions to improve it, but also often corrected pronunciation mistakes for me. At last, my pronunciation has greatly been improved with your help.

第三段：感谢和表示祝福的话怎么说呢？

表示感谢的句型：Many thanks for…/ It’s very kind of you./ I’d like to thank all the help that you’ve given me.

表示祝福的句型：Best wishes to you./ Wish you a healthy and happy life./ Good luck to you!

范文：

I’d like to thank all the help that you’ve given me, Mr Liu. Wish you a healthy and happy life.

结束语和署名：Yours sincerely, 写在右下角

Carl

总结本节课所讲内容

1.拓展句子方法之并列关系

1）判定方法：“和，并且，不但…而且...”带进去读

2）写作方法：not only … but also…(句首、句中；+句子/单词/短语)

3）例题：She can not only play the piano, but also dance very well.

注意not only 放句首引导的句子用倒装结构，如：Not only can she play the piano, but also she can dance very well.

2. 由that引导的宾语从句的判定

凡是结构可以表示为sb +动词（认为/想/觉得/看到/注意到…）+动词的内容，这

样的句子可以写成：sb+v+that引导的宾语从句的结构3.寒暄语及感谢和祝福的套用句型

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