商务英语写作report案例

Practical English Writing

—for Working Purposes

Part one: An Overview of Business Writing 商务写作概述

1. Criteria for Effective Business Writing

6 “C ”原则：

Completeness（完整）

Clarity（清楚）

Concreteness（具体）

Conciseness（简洁）

Correctness（正确）

Courtesy（礼貌）& Consideration（体谅）

2.Tips for Modern Business Writing 商务信函的写作技巧

?Identifying the writing purpose in the beginning 开门见山谈目的

常见信函开头

?Letter of enquiry: We read about your advertisement in the local newspaper and would like to have more information about MaplelandIndustrial Park.

?Letter of order: We would like to order the following goods:

?Letter of invitation: We are pleased to invite you to the launch of English Tomorrow, the exciting new program for business English learners.

?Letter of thanks: I am writing to thank you for the hospitality you extended on our visit to your company.

?Letter of complaint: I am writing to complain about your handling of the order No.

B13 and say how disappointed we are with how this order has been dealt with.

?Letter of apology: Thank you for your letter dated 25 June. First of all, I would like to apologise for the unsatisfactory handling of your order.

?Letter of reply: Thank you for your enquiry of 23 May, in which you expressed an interest in our Grace silk blouses.

?Basing your opinion on facts基于事实论观点

Examples

?“The customers here have always been satisfied with your products. However, some

European manufactures have recently launched new models which are catching on very fast. Therefore we wonder whether you can i mprove your present designs.”

?Using small paragraphs 分段

Poor paragraghing:

Dear Mr. Miller,

I’ve just received your fax and after searching for different pos sibilities, this is what I can offer you:

10% discount on the total prize if you book our offices for 18 months, could it be interesting for you?You asked us for 4 offices in RiversideTower and we only have 4 left but placed in different floors and there are no parking spaces left. Would you mind if I search what you need in OceanPalace?OceanPalace is a big Tower with 300 parking spaces, it has wonderful views to TulipPark and the public transport connections are really good.I’ve just checked if we have 4 offices left in O ceanPalace and for your information we have them now!! At the same floor and one is 10㎡and the last one is 20 ㎡as you required.

Please let me know if you are interested in this possibility.

Yours sincerely,

William Cruise

Better paragraphing

Dear Mr. Miller,

Thank you for your order b y fax. I’d like to mention that I can offer you 10% discount if you are booking for 18-month period.

We have 4 offices left in RiversideTower as you required but they are on different floors.

Also there is no parking space available at the moment in RiversideTower. However, I can offer you a very interesting alternative in OceanPalaceBuilding:

? 4 offices as you required on same floor

?300 parking spaces and good public transport connections for your employees ?Wonderful views.

Please think about this alternative and the discount I mentioned before. I look forward to hearing from you soon so I can make the booking.

Yours sincerely,

?Using appropriate tone 使用恰当的语气

上级对下级，话题为卫生检查，语气直接。

Dear all,

There will be a visit from health and safety inspectors on Monday, April 1st from 9 a.m. to 15

p.m. As the inspection is necessary for our quality management certificate, please be prepared for the inspection by telling the staff to tidy up their workplace.

Sam Powell

General Manager

下级对上级，话题为请假，语气委婉。

Dear Mr. Johnson,

I would like to attend a seminar on 3 April. It is about presentation skills. Since I have to make many presentation to our clients, this seminar will be very useful.

Could you tell me if it is possible to take time off work to attend the seminar？

Thanks

Angela

?Using more active voice and proper linking words多使用主动语态和连词

Use transition：

Example：

I am the product manager of the Food Service Division. I was instructed by John Carson to evaluate our Lite Fruit marketing strategy. I have analyzed the effect of the marketing campaign on the division. The campaign has run at a loss for two years. I studied the division’s recent cost-income data and consumer—trend reports. I recommend continuing the Lite Fruit campaign. I urge increasing the price of Lite Fruit and directing a large portion of the advertising budget to male consumers.

修改后：

John Carson instructed me, as product manager of the Food Service Division, to evaluate our Lite Fruit marketing strategy. When I analyzed the effect of the marketing campaign on the division, I found the campaign had run at a loss for two years. To determine the root of the problem, I studied the division’s recent cost—income data and consumer—trend reports. Now that I have completely my report, I recommend continuing the Lite Fruit campaign,increasing the price of Lite Fruit,and directing a large portion of the advertising budget to male consumers.

?Using courteous expressions 措辞礼貌得体

3. The Layout of Business Letters 商务信函的写作格式

正式的商务信函包含7个部分：信头、日期、封内地址、称呼、正文、信尾客套语和签名。示例如下:

Part Two: Writing Business Letters 商务信函写作

1.Letters of Enquiry 咨询信函

Useful sentence patterns

?We learn from …that your company specialize in …and would like to establish

business relationship with you.

?Your firm has been introduced ( recommended ) to us by … and now we would like

to have more information about …

?We are interested in …you advertised recently in…and would be grateful if you

could send us a pamphlet as well as the catalogue and price-list of your products.

?I understand you are manufactures (dealers in ) of … and should like to know if you

can supply us with …

Sample Letter 1

Dear MS Brown

With reference to your advertisement in the local newspaper, we would like to have more information about it.

·Could you tell us which other firms are in the area, and what are the sizes of the units available for rental.

·Regarding the financial help mentioned, we would like to know who would qualify for it and how to apply.

·Another point we want to clarify is the skilled labor costs here compared with other areas. ·Finally, we would be grateful if you could send us the information pack to our address.

We look forward to hearing from you soon.

Yours sincerely

Sample Letter 2

Dear Ms Budd,

I am writing ________1) your advertisement in Frozen World trade journal_________2) further information about the services your company offers.

We are a producer of frozen food products based in Helsingor in Denmark _____3)we are looking for a new transport company to make regular deliveries to different parts of Europe.

_____4) , could you tell me if you make deliveries to countries outside the European Union –Russia, ___________5)? ________________6) how many lorries you have ___________7)you are able to deal with small cargoes which do not occupy a complete lorry.

________8) , I would be grateful if you could give us a sample quotation for a shipment of 40 tons of frozen fish from helsingor to Vienna _________9) we can have an idea of your prices.

I look forward to hearing from you..

Yours sincerely

2.Letters of Application求职信函

求职信函成功要素

?Tell the reader what you want and what you can do for the company.

?Keep it brief, succinct and simple.

?Be specific about the job you are seeking and quantify your accomplishments.

?Make it easy on the eyes.

?Be polite and confident.

Sample Letters

1 应聘求职信

Dear Mr Zhang,

In response to your job advertisement in Chutian Daily, I am writing to apply for the tour guide position in your company.

I will graduate from WuhanUniversity with a Bachelor’s degree in English tourism this June.

I have been taking courses on the English language and tourism for more than three years and got straight As for all of them. I know the importance of putting book knowledge into practice, so I have been working as a part-time guide for the Sunday Holiday for 2 years and have accumulated rich experience. In addition, I can understand and speak French as a second language.

I am available for a job interview at your convenience. Please contact me through , or . Thank you for your time!

Yours sincerely

2. 自荐求职信

Dear Sir or Madam

I am writing to ask if you need a civil engineer in your corporation, starting August 1 of this year.

I am from the HenanProvince and currently attending the Graduate School of Wuhan University, pursuing a master’s degree in Civil Engineering. With the records I have achieved up to now, I am certain that I shall earn my M.S. Degree in the coming July.

I obtained my B.S. Degree in Civil Engineering from Huazhong University of Science and Technology in July 2005. Then I served the Hubei Construction Engineering Company as an assistant civil engineer for three years. During this period, I was engaged in surveying , road design, site supervision, and structural design for multistory buildings.

Enclosed you may find my resume and my academic records. Civil Engineering is indeed an

extensive field. Within this field, I am most interested and competent in Structural Design and Foundation Engineering.

I am an energetic young man capable of hard work. I assure you that if my application is successful, I will do my best. Thank you for your time and consideration. I hope to hear from you soon.

Yours faithfully

David Lee

3.Letters of Complaints 投诉信函

投诉信1

Dear Sir or Madam,

We bought the FM211 copier at the July Business Eqipment Show in the New YorkExhibitionCenter. Now it has been acting up a bit.

We have followed the operation procedure carefully, but every now and then it gives 20copies instead of two, followed by 20 sheets of blank paper before we can stop it.

We are therefore requesting immediate and free repair of the copier. It is urgent because our normal office work has been seriously delayed.

Sincerely yours,

投诉信2

Dear Sir or Madam,

I write regarding a training course on Communication Skills which I attended 27 November.

I chose your company as it was highly recommended, but the courses I attended was disappointing. First, I was promised an experienced trainer but unfortunately he was sick and the replacement was not as good as expected. Second, the information packs were only a pile of loose photocopies, which was not promised. Third, the class was supposed to be about 8 people but in fact there were 15. Last, I should make it clear that the class started 1 hour late, and the lunch served was cold.

Therefore, I would be glad if you could look into this matter and take measures to ensure such things will never happen again.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Yours sincerely

投诉信3

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to complain about your handling of Order No.127 for 30 Sandalwood chairs and say how disappointed we are with how this order has been dealt with.

When we placed order with you in 9 December, we were assured that the chairs would be sent to us within 15 days. In fact, it has actually taken nearly one month to deliver the goods.

In addition, two of the chairs are badly scratched and will need replacing.

Also, we are told as we are established customers, you would give us a special discount of 10% off your catalogue prices. I noticed from your invoice that this discount has not been given.

I trust any future orders we place with you will be dealt with in a more satisfactory manner.

I look forward toyour reply.

Yours faithfully

1. 建立贸易关系 (Establishing Trade Relations)

一个公司，一家企业，要想进入市场，寻找货源，求生存，求发展，最首要的工作是与别的商家建立贸易关系。达此目的的途径很多，如阅读广告、参加交易会、参观访问、引荐介绍等。此外，还可以直接通过书信的形式建立贸易关系。

建立贸易关系信函的写作可以按照以下步骤进行：

1) 告诉对方从何种途径获得对方的信息 (如：通过……得知……)。

2) 写明去函的目的：了解对方经营产品的情况；提供本公司产品的情况。

3) 希望保持联系。

另外，信函措辞应礼貌诚恳、热情、表达清楚透彻。

实例

常用套语

1. As your name and address appear on Yangtse Evening Post, we are writing to you with a desire to open an account with you / to establish business relation with you.

我们在《扬子晚报》上看到贵公司的名称和地址，非常希望与贵方建立商务关系。

2. We write to introduce ourselves as one of the leading exporters of a wide range of...

我们作为主要的出口商之一，经营……

3. We are enjoying an excellent reputation and we should like to offer you our service.

本公司具有良好的信誉，并愿意向贵方提供服务。

4. We are willing to enter into business relations with you on the basis of equality and mutual benefit and exchanging needed goods.

我方乐于在平等互利、互通有无的基础上与贵方建立贸易关系。

5. Your desire to establish direct business relations with us coincides with ours.

贵方与我建立直接的贸易关系的愿望与我方打算相吻合。

6. We are also enclosing a catalogue showing the details of our line.

附上一本我公司经营产品的详细目录。

7. ...that you'll be quite satisfied with our goods and service.

……贵方将对我们的货物及服务满意。

2. 销售信函 (Sales Letter)

推销产品是商务活动中一重要环节，其目的是要吸引对方的注意，激发购买欲望，最后售出货物。销售信函内容应包括：

1) 介绍所推销产品的情况，如性能、价格等较同类产品的优越。

2) 附带一些优惠条件或帮助。

此类信函需措辞得当、简洁精练、语气肯定、具有说服力。忌离题、冗长、华而不实。

实例

常用套语

2.1. We take pleasure in enclosing the latest catalogue of... / price list of...

我方十分乐意为您（贵方）寄上我们最新的……商品目录 / 价格表。

2.2. This item, superior in quality and moderate in price, is sure to be salable in your market.

本产品质量上乘，价格适中，在你方市场一定有销路。

2.3. We expect you to try our products and are sure that you would be pleased with...

希望贵方使用我方的产品，相信贵方对……定会感到满意。

2.4. We inform you that since price is subject to change, please put an order before 8 Oct. if possible.

敬告贵方，由于价格可能变动，如果可能请在10月8日前订货。

2.5. We regret that we have had no opportunity to do business with you.

很遗憾我方与贵公司仍未有生意往来。

2.6. The high quality of our product is well known and universally acknowledged.

我方产品的高质量已是众所周知，并得到广泛认可。

2.7. We stand ready to serve you.

我们随时乐意为您提供服务。

5. 催款 (Urging Payment)

撰写催款信函是一件迫不得已而为之的事，但有时也是商务活动必不可少的一部分。催款活动必要时可以按照以下四个步骤操作：第一步，去函提醒 (remind)；第二步，去函询问(inquire)；第三步，去函请求 (appeal)；第四步，去函要求 (demand)。每封催款信不宜过长，初次联系，应在开头简要介绍自己的情况。语言表述应清楚、得体、诚恳。

实例

Remind

Inquiry

Appeal

Demand

常用套语

5.1. Our records show that your account of... is past due.

我们的记录显示贵方账款……逾期了。

5.2. We shall be greatly obliged if you will remit us a check for the goods.

若贵方汇寄支票付款，我方将十分感谢。

5.3. In spite of 2 reminders, the above account still remains unsettled.

尽管我方曾两次催款，上述账目仍未结清。

5.4. We shall be grateful for an early settlement.

望贵方及早偿付。

5.5. We wish to call your attention to the enclosed account which is now past due. We shall appreciate your prompt remittance.

兹随函附上逾期账单，敬请注意。如蒙迅速支付甚为感激。

5.6. If we fail to receive from you a check of... dollars in 5 days, we will have to hand over this matter to the lawyers.

如果五日后我们仍未收到贵方……支票，我们将不得不求助于律师介入了。

5.7. We trust that we shall be able to find a favorable solution.

相信我们将能找到一个令人满意的解决方案。

6. 抱怨索赔函 (Complaint and Claim)

在贸易活动中，买卖双方因一方未履行所达成协议致使另一方蒙受损失，或者人们对购得的商品或得到的服务不满意时，可以向对方抱怨或提出索赔，以求问题得到尽快、妥善的解决。撰写此类信函时应注意：

1) 直截了当提出原定的条件，列举不满事实、理由以及造成的后果。

2) 明确提出解决的方法。

3) 语言有礼有节，语气坚决诚恳。

实例

Letter of Complaint

常用套语

6.1. We have duly received the goods of your shipment, but unfortunately they are not in accordance with the sample.

我方已按时收到贵方发运的货物。然而不幸的是，它们与样品完全不符。

6.2. We are sorry to inform you that the delivery is far from being satisfactory.

很遗憾，我们不得不告知贵方：发货远不能令人满意。

6.3. The goods weigh short by... kilos / be short in weight by... kilos.

货物短重……公斤。

6.4. We regret to inform you that one of the cases of your delivery arrived in a badly damaged condition.

遗憾地通知贵方，运来的箱子中有一箱到达时严重破损。

6.5. ...be unfit to use ……无法使用

6.6. ...(be) below standard in quality... ……质量未达标。

6.7. ...we require a full refund for the delivery.

……我方要求对发货全额赔偿。

6.8. In support of our claim, we are sending you a survey report issued by the Commodity Inspection Bureau.

为了说明我方索赔理由，现寄上商检局的检验报告。

6.9. We are looking forward to your settlement at an early date.

希望贵方早日解决这一问题。

销售信函

488 Lucky Street

Changchun, China130012

Tel: (0431) 6475893

November 29, 2011

Spectacular Advertising

1324 Sunny Street

Changchun Jilin Province130012

Dear Business Owner,

Do you look forward to gallop in the grassland? 叙述

Our firm presents a new package which is travel in Mongolia two days. We will bring fabulous journey to you.

During the journey, you can visit natural view, ride horse to gallop, enjoy Mongolian dance and wrestling, taste pure dairy products, and live in yurts.

The biggest benefit for you is you will save lots of money. You can get free accommodation because you are the business travel, which means our company will pay expense of the accommodation for you. In addition, our company will present some souvenirs of Mongolian characteristic for you when you return. You will have a

cheap and exciting journey.

Don’thesitate! Call me quickly!

Sincerely,

Nina

Sales Manager

Report

例文分析3 A Sales Report

This report describes recent results in the Danish market, the reasons for them and suggests actions that we can take in the future to improve sales.

Overall, it has been a disappointing year, with sales falling by 30% compared to the previous year. However, this should be seen in the context of difficult trading conditions: everyone in the market is reporting decreased sales.

For us there are three factors causing our situation more difficult, they are:

— a new IKEA store opened near Copenhagen four months ago, attracting business from other shops.

—We only have Italian brochures and customers would like them in Danish.

—Central, our biggest customer, has refuse to order more lamps unless we increase their commission to 25%.

On a more positive note, the market seems to be recovering and consumers are spending again. We also have the prospect of a contract to supply lamps to the Chancery chain of hotels, which is about to refurnish twelve hotels here.

In order to take advantage of the improving market, I would like to make three recommendations:

1)that Danish brochures are made available as soon as possible.

2)that we increase the rate of commission to all our customers to 25%.

3)That we invest in some advertising in lifestyle and interior design magazines.

Please feel free to contact me about any of the above points.

4．例文分析4 A Business Trip Report

Report on China Visit

This report gives a summary of my meetings with various representatives of the Chinese tea industry and aims to give an impression of what it is like to do business in China.

The aims of my visit to China were to:

-meet tea experts find more about the products.

-discuss the logistics of exporting tea from China.

I made two interesting contracts: Li Sung, a tea master and Qiu Li, an export agent. Li Sung really knows his subject and will be able to recommend to us the best teas to buy and what the sources for these are. Qiu Li has worked with other western firms before and will be able to deal with the necessary authorities for exporting the teas.

Both of them seem happy to work with us. Li Sung will want a fee for his consultancy and Qiu Li will work for us on a commission basis.

My advice for the person who follows this visit is:

-to spend more time getting to know these two partners. Li Sung in particular is not a man to be hurries and his interest appears to be more in the tea itself than the business.

-to make a firm proposal to Qiu Li that she can study and get back to us on

Memo

范文:

From: Olive HR Manager

To: All staff

Date: 12 June, 2008

Subject: Appointment of Francisco

Here we announce the appointment of Mrs. Francisco as our new Sales Manager of the Headquarter.

She will be starting her job next Monday morning. There will be a small welcome party by 9:00 that day so everyone please be on time.

Memo备忘录写作方法:

写作之前要考虑以下因素：

Who is going to read my memo?

What has the reader already known about this?

What does the reader need to know?

How is the reader going to respond my memo?

Date: 日期

BEC属于英联邦国家的考试，日期的写法一般为日、月、年，比如7 December 2002，注意月份用英文而不是数字，以免和日期混淆，可以缩写，比如将一月写作Jan(也可以用开放标点)。

Britney Spears, Jennifer Aniston等；若显示关系亲密，还可以把名字缩写，比如B. Gates, M. Scofield, J. Chou, B. Spears, J. Aniston等；如果写给上级，还应该加上尊称甚至职位，比如Mr. Bill Gates — Managing Director, Mr. Jay Chou — Art Director等；现代商务写作中流行开放标点(Open Punctuation)，即标点不影响理解的时候可以不用，所以Mr./Ms./Mrs.后面的省略点也可以省去，简单写成Mr/Ms/Mrs；最好不要省去名字。范文

To: All Staff .

From: Bill Gates

Date: 7 December 2002

Subject: Staff Reward

The profits of our company this month went up 10% compared with the same period last year, due to your hard work and long working hours. I would like to thank you for your long devot ed service. A trip to Hawaii has been arranged next month as a prize. Enjoy!

常用的套语

附件是……，请参阅。

?Please kindly find the attached……

?Attached please kindly find the ……

?Enclosed is the ……, please kindly find it.

?Attached you will find……,

我已经收到您的邮件。

?I have received your email (yesterday/last week/this morning……).

?Your email has been received.

非常感谢您的回信。

?Thanks very much for your early reply.

?Thank you for your email.

我明白您的意思。

?I know what you mean.

?I understand what you mean.

?Got it. （*非常口语化，适合于关系很熟悉的同事朋友之间。）

我不太明白您的意思。

?I do not quite understand what you meant.

?I have some problem understanding what you meant.

您能具体解释一下么？您能在说的清楚一点么？

?Could you please put it in a clearer way?

?Could you please explain it in detail?

?Could you please further explain it?

?What do you mean exactly by saying……？

如有问题，请随时和我联系。

?Contact me if you have any problem.

?If there is any uncertainty, feel free to contact me.

?Call me if you have any problem.

如有建议，请指出。

?Please let me know if anything needs to be improved.

?Your advice/suggestion will be greatly appreciated.

我会进一步修改/检查的。

?I will further modify it.

?I will further check it.

一旦确认，我会立刻/第一时间通知您的。

?Once confirmed, I will let you know immediately.

?Once confirmed, I will notice you ASAP. （*ASAP=as soon as possible 尽快）

希望尽快得到您的回复。

?I’m looking forward to your early reply.

?Your promote reply will be greatly appreciated.

?Your early reply will be highly appreciated.

谢谢。

?Thanks a lot.

?Thank you very much.

?Many thanks. （*用于关系熟悉的同事朋友间。）

希望您一切都好/万事如意。

?I hope everything goes well with you.

?I wish you all the best.

I will advise the status at my soonest.

These ring light were supposed to go on (与…搭配) the 17 units of Z14 with 0.5X objective code 11.

send us pictures or diagrams on how to fit them

This would be a monthly shipment to him of 2 to 3 units. 每月发货2-3台。Could you confirm by return if the following will be arranged? 请回邮确认下列事项是否已安排。

Let’s do it in this way.

I also assume you mean that we will not need U011 to return the sample set (15x eyepiece + micrometer + retainer). If my understand is incorrect, please remind us in return. Thanks again. 按我理解，你的意思是……

Could you double check？

I had communicated with U011 and they like the idea of sending them one each （各一个）of new SK model samples for their review before real production in factory, then issues similar to S004 can be avoided.

Please bear in mind that we are going to charge U011 for these samples, so we need the samples in “sellable condition” and functional well. We have no intention to take them back.

We do not to need to stick to the flat Battery design……

XX, would it be possible to arrange the following items for…

Further to our phone conversation, 1)…..2)….3)…关于电话会议内容，补充如下

Regarding….关于……

I will leave the decision to U011 to choose between S004’s version or to keep U011 existing version.

Kindly let me know the above at your soonest convenience.

I am not sure if this limited information will be sufficient fo r us to tell if……

Well noted (about….).明白(某事)。

For easy reference for XX,……为XX 更便于理解,……

I forgot if I ever mentioned to you about this. Anyway, I like to inform you that……

Kindly jot me a note when you receive……

When you are done, please courier it to the following address

HK will cover the courier cost.

Thanks a lot for all your help in this unusual situation.

商务英语写作教学大纲

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商务英语课程教学大纲文稿归稿存档编号：[KKUY-KKIO69-OTM243-OLUI129-G00I-FDQS58-

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